MVP – Josh Donaldson, Constantinople
Cy Young – Carlos Martinez, Constantinople
Manager of the Year- Tom 

Harold could not take a break as the ballpark rained success upon CN.  The only bad luck for CN was the injury of Bryce Harper and Alex Gordon. 

CN came in with 8 pitchers eligible to be tired and Arrieta needing to go the distance.  They scored 4 on a grand slam ball park homer by Donaldson in the first inning.  Then the bats went to sleep until Harold knocked Arrieta out in the 9^th – 2 men on and Rasmus playing for the injured Harper made a 2 base error, then Arrieta got Hosmer for the first out, but after a ballpark single, he hit the showers.  Kelley came out and faced the mutant Parker who hit a triple off Kelley’s card to tie the game.  Grandal walked and Gregorious laid down a suicide squeeze.  A "12" and he popped it up into a double play and we go to the bottom of the 9^th.  Three straight pinch hitters for CN and with one man on Trout came up and hit a clean homerun for the walk off win.

Game 2 saw CN have a ballpark homer robbed, but Harold could not push a run across and CN wins it 6-0.

Game 3 saw CN hit 4 ball park homers to win 8-3 in a game that was never close.

Game 4  had CN and NO tied at 3 after 4, but 2 homers over 4 innings allowed CN to pull it out 7-3 to cement the sweep.

Draft Day, April 1

Game 1:  The battle of the aces led to 23 strikeouts and 1 run.  CN won the game in the sixth on a double by Donaldson and an RBI double by Rizzo.

Game 2:  OC's David Price takes a cue from the first game and pitched a shutout for a 4-0 win as Jed's mutant Mahtook hit a 3 run dinger in a game that was a laugher for the home team.

Game 3:  The defensive low scoring series ended as CN came out and scored early and often to win 15-2.  Both sides had 2 homers but CN just had all the luck in this one. Crawford had 2 errors and Choo had an error and gave up a couple of doubles as it was just sloppy play overall.

Game 4:  This was a Computer classic.  After 9 innings, it was all tied up at 4-4.  The bottom of the 10th Harper kicks a ball for a 3 base error and with 2 outs and a man on 3rd. OC's Texeira came to bat and the unidentified CN pitcher threw a wild pitch to give OC the win.  However it was not a Catcher X wild pitch, but the random super advanced rule wild pitch rule that sometimes occurs when you try and have lowe fences as well. The computer ends the game with no chance to undo.  So our intrepid computer players set up a game to be played from that point, but oops forgot that CN was the away team.  The managers decide to ignore that half inning and get to the 2 out Texeira at bat.  He strikes out.  On the 3rd try to finish the game, both relievers start the game and the lineups are set to reflect the inning 11 order.  CN's Escobar makes an out, Trout gets a hit and Harper (of the 3 base error) comes up and hits a 2 run homer.  The other half of the inning went 1-2-3 and CN pulls out the strange 3-1 series win.

It was an unlucky day for BC.  CN got up early in game 1 on home runs by Harper, Donaldson and Rizzo to go up 7-1.  Robin came roaring back to tag Arrieta for 5 runs but fell just short to lose 7-6.

In game 2, CN got brilliant pitching from Garcia and 3 relievers to blank BC (allowing only one extra base hit on a LFx chance) for a final score of 7-0.

McCullers tried to rally BC in game 3 and it was 3-3 going into the 8^th when Forsythe led off with a ballpark homer chance 1-19.  But Tom rolls a 20 and with the low fences, it’s caught by Marte.  No matter as Harper and Trout followed with back to back homers and McCullers hit the showers.  Donaldson took Zack Britton deep to make the game 6-3 which held up for the CN victory.

In the finale, BC hoped to avoid the sweep, but to no avail as CN scored 7 for a 7-4 victory and series sweep.

The fence came into account multiple times in the series.  BC Travis hit a homer 1-6 flyout and got a 7 but Trout came down with the ball.  Rizzo hit a ball park homer 20 that was caught by Marte.  Raburn hit a ballpark homer 19 that bounced off of Piscotty’s glove for the round tripper.  Miggy hit a ballpark homer 19 that Gordon pulled in for the out.  Forsythe did one as noted above 20-15 also caught by Marte.  BC also missed a ball park single chance (1-19).

So for a generous ballpark the fence came into play 4 times on ballpark homers resulting in 3 outs and one homer split that ended up in an out.  It also allowed 8 other homers on ballpark chances.

Meanwhile...

The first game was a seesaw affair where Oceanus ultimately claimed a 7-4 victory.  The Assholes took the lead 2-0 only to have a 6th-inning Seager grand slam put them in a 4-2 bind.  This after Oceanus intentionally walked ultimate lefty killer Stanton to load the bases (eliciting a shocked "really" from Randy).  Oceanus' strategy of not letting Stanton beat them had backfired and with Greinke pitching, the situation seemed dire.  But Oceanus scratched back a run in the bottom of the 6th to tighten it up and then had one of those "Strat-O" innings in the 8th where nothing could go wrong against lefty relievers McGee and Alvarez (6 hits in the inning).  Vizcaino and Gregerson pitched scoreless relief for the Assholes, with Gregerson getting the save.  Not shown in the box score was the plethora of "picks" for both sides - lots of 1's, 2's and 3's.  It was a classic Strat-O-Matic game, where both sides felt they could've / should've won, and I believe it was this game where Randy said he had "snatched defeat from the jaws of victory."

In game 2 Oceanus jumped to a 4-0 lead against Kershaw in the bottom of the 4th, breaking up a strong pitchers' duel with Price.  Future Wax could never get its offense untracked.  Eithier hit a solo shot in the 9th but overall the bats were pretty silent with just 4 hits.  Moustakas was the hero for Oceanus with a 2-RBI single to provide essentially the game-winning hit.  Price allowed 3 hits and 1 walk in 5 innings for his 7th win of the year.  Cody (not Chad) Allen, in spite of allowing the Ethier HR, got the save, with 3 solid innings of relief.  In the end, 5-1 Assholes.

Game 3 ended up a 8-3 laugher for Future Wax.  They scored 3 runs in the first and 2 in the second, which with Scherzer on the mound should've provided a comfortable lead.  But the Assholes score 3 runs of their own so they were only down 5-3.  Future Wax added a run in the 5th but at that point there was still a bit of hope left for Oceanus.  With 2 more runs in the 6th, Future Wax had a commanding 8-3 advantage and as it turned out, the Assholes never mounted any serious challenge.  Scherzer scattered 9 hits for a complete-game victory.  Corey Kluber was hammered for 6 runs on 9 hits in 4.1 innings.  Seager and Stanton hit HRs for Future Wax and Moustakas had a dinger for Oceanus.

Future Wax was looking for the satisfying split in game 4 and did jump out to a 1-0 lead in the second inning on a McCann HR.  But Oceanus responded with 3 runs in the third, another in the 4th and an insurance run in the 7th as Future Wax was stymied by 5 innings of shutout relief from Warren, Uehara, Gregerson and O'Day, culminating in a 5-1 Oceanus win.  Both teams got 9 hits but the Assholes were able to string them together more effectively.  A key play occurred when Randy decided to steal 2nd with Machado on a 1-14 chance.  I had just removed Hernandez, whose +3 hold would have given Machado a 1-17 chance.  The split was a 16.  Randy subsequently got a couple of hits and so would at a minimum have had bases loaded with no outs.  Instead, no runs came in and the best Future Wax chance came to naught.  

Joey Votto was the overall star for Oceanus, hitting .538 for the series with a couple of doubles and a HR.  The Assholes had 15 doubles to make up for only 2 HR and hit .308 as a team.  For Future Wax, Seager hit .545 with a couple of HR (including the game 1 GS), Ethier hit .571, Machado .500 and McCann .462.

Oceanus hit .362 as a team, benefiting from game 1 where Dan Haren was left in to absorb a pounding.  Inciarte hit 3 HR, at least 2 of which were BP (1-5).  O'Day picked up 2 saves and now has 14.  Cody Allen managed to pick up 2 victories.  The bullpen overall didn't allow any runs in 12.2 innings.

WES hit .279 as a team but only one HR.  The team ERA was 7.82, skewed by Haren's 19.00.  Markakis hit .438, Turner .375 and Jones .353.

Here are the slightly-edited computer-generated summaries:

Game 1: First baseman Joey Votto blasted 2 homeruns and had 4 RBI and Dallas Keuchel pitched a complete game as Oceanus destroyed What Eric Said? by a score of 19 to 5.

Votto was a one-man wrecking crew.  He hit a bases-empty home run in the 3rd inning, blasted a solo shot in the 5th inning, stroked a one-base hit resulting in a run in the 6th inning and delivered a base-hit which scored a run in the 7th inning.  Oceanus provided plenty of action in the 6th inning when they had 5 runs on 4 hits and the 8th inning with 4 runs on 4 hits.  The Oceanus offense was as consistent as it was powerful.  They scored in every inning, making a joke of the What Eric Said? pitching.  

Game 2: Third baseman Mike Moustakas had 2 base hits at the ballpark as the Assholes beat What Eric Said? in 11 innings by the count of 5 to 3.

Both teams had scored 3 runs after nine full innings.  Finally, Oceanus prevailed in the 11th inning.  Michael Brantley started the inning off right when he doubled.  Francisco Cervelli stepped into the batter's box and he laid down a sacrifice bunt.  Shin-Soo Choo was next to the plate, but was promptly struck out.  Joe Ross then fired a sharp breaking ball that appeared to cross-up the catcher.  In any event, it got by him and was ruled a passed ball which plated a run.  Ender Inciarte came to the plate and lofted a solo-blast 'downtown'.  Oceanus had 13 hits for the afternoon.  

The win went to Cody Allen who allowed no runs in 1 inning. Allen got help from Darren O'Day who was credited with his 13th save.  Ross was given the loss in relief. 

Game 3: Shin-Soo Choo connected with a 'big fly' as Oceanus beat What Eric Said? by the count of 3 to 1.

Corey Kluber earned his pay with a solid performance for Oceanus.  He was reached for 5 hits and 4 walks in 6 innings.  Oceanus had 9 hits for the afternoon.  

Darren O'Day got the save, his 14th.  The losing pitcher was former Asshole Lance Lynn.  He was touched for 9 hits and 4 walks in 6 and 2/3 innings. 

Game 4: The Assholes bested What Eric Said? by a 8 to 5 score at the ballpark.

Behind 5-1 after 5 innings, Oceanus made it 5-4 after 6.  Then Oceanus jumped on top of What Eric Said? in the top of the 7th inning as they scored 2 runs on 2 base hits.  Oceanus had 14 hits for the afternoon while What Eric Said? had 11.  

Cody Allen got credit for the victory, pitching 2 innings and allowing no runs. Koji Uehara recorded the save.  The loss was charged to Aroldis Chapman in relief. 

(1/24) Tom and Randy’s showdown for first place led to a 20-inning affair in game 1 - the 2^nd longest game (tied with two other games) in league history.

Game 1: During the first nine innings, both teams had lead off triples.  Martin led off the 5^th with a Homer 1-19, 20 triple.  Tripled and then A bunter Alcides Escobar laid down a bad suicide squeeze to get Martin cut down at home.  Russell led of the 7^th with a triple for FW and Arrieta then struck out the next three batters.

Its 0-0 after 10.

CN puts up 2 runs on a 2 run homer in the 11^th by Sano and then Martin hit his second triple of the game, but was left on third again on what turned to be an important run. The Wax came back in the bottom of the 11^th with a leadoff homerun by Russell.  This is followed by a BS* (1-6), ssx for a short single and two walks to tie the game at 2-2 with no outs and the bases loaded.  A K and a double play later and the teams are on to the 1th inning.  Both teams had 1 inning relievers pitch the 15^th-19^th innings.  The 20^th saw a new FW pitcher Carson Smith come out of the pen and he gave up 3 runs.  CN followed with Will Harris for the save and it was a 20 inning 5-2 win.

Randy refused CN’s offer to count game 1 as 2 wins and just skip Kershaw’s game 2 start.

Kershaw won game 2 3-1, highlighted by back to back homers by Ethier and Seager to seal the game.  CN missed two BPHRs and had a clutch out in the game.

Wax continued to dominate as Scherzer won a game 3 laugher 4-1.

Game 4 looked bad for the Manatees as Wax got out to an early 2-1 lead and then Randy rolled a BPHR, announced that they were due and rolled a “2” (where BPHR are 1-2).  It was a homer for a 3 run lead. (It was his 3^rd BPHR chance of the series and he ended up 1-4 in BPHR chances.  CN went 0 for 5 in the series) A Mike Trout homer got the game to 3-2 after 6.  CN’s 8^th inning featured a Harper double and Trout strikeout to set up a clutch situation for Raburn.  Alex Gordon was called on and he delivered a clutch hit to tie the game 3-3.  Donaldson followed and hit a second clutch hit to put CN up 4-3 and they held on for the series split.

In game 1, Keuchel pitched a complete game with no earned runs en route to a 6-1 Asshole victory.  Oceanus hammered out 14 hits including 5 doubles.  It was a close game until Wilhelmsen allowed the floodgates to open in the 8th, where the Assholes put up 4 runs.  Richards pitched fairly well in defeat - 2 runs in 6.1 innings.

Oceanus got to Thor early in game 2, tiring him out in the first inning.  He stayed in to take one for the team.  The Assholes ended up winning 9-0, with Price pitching a gem (allowing 3 H with 1 BB and 12 K).  Oceanus hit 5 HR in the game, including 2 from Crawford.

The Smoking Loons took game 3 by a slim 5-4 margin, in a game that was tight all the way.  Eric masterfully managed his 5 relievers, who combined to pitch 5 shutout innings.  The Assholes had 12 hits to the Loons 7 but could not put them together to enough meaningful effect.  Newcomer Tony Watson got the win.  Nolan Arenado went 3-4 with 2 HR and a double.

Despite Bogaerts lead off HR to start game 4, and another Bogaerts HR later in the game, the Loons fell 5-2.  This time it was the Asshole bullpen that was masterful, with 4 no-hit shutout innings of relief.  Darren O'Day notched his 12th save.  Mutant starter Jesse "Wrath of" Hahn was ineffective allowing 3 runs in 4 innings and taking the loss.  Felix Hernandez got the win in spite of allowing the 2 HR to Bogaerts.

Oceanus hit .333 as a team for the series with 8 HR.  The team had a 1.50 ERA overall.  Crawford and Teixeira combined for 5HR and 13 RBI.  Both Votto and Brantley (even without the presence of Robin) hit over .460. Bogaerts and Arenado with 2 HR each led the Smoking Loons.  Watson was effective in his debut, appearing 3 times and allowing only 1 run in 4.1 innings. Teixeira had 2 SB, meaning that I (virtually) rolled a 2 twice.  That was a head shaker.  I didn't keep track but I think I was better than 50 percent on BP HR chances (1-10 for L).  I did miss some but overall I'd say the luck was in my favor. Also Jed hit a 1 on a BP dinger for righties....

..... 

Meanwhile, down in Mansfield, with its season hanging by a thread, North Dakota won 3 of 4 from high flying Constantinople to win its first series of the season.  North Dakota had all the luck, and its bats finally came to life in the CN bandbox (1-19 for everything). 

All four games were blowouts; the only managing either manager had to do was to manage innings and at bats.  ND won game 1, 10-4 smashing a seasons worth of frustration by belting out 6 home runs, including 2 by Lindor.  Game 2 was the closest game, ND winning 7-4 but was really never in doubt, with ND hitting 3 more homers (including Goldschmidt's 3^rd 1-11 roll of the series and Lindor’s 3^rd 2-11 roll of the series).  CN turned the tides in game 3, winning 13-1 (only 2 homers) against the failed starting pitching experiment, Tyson Ross.  But North Dakota came back to win the finale 12-4 with 4 more homers (2 by Travis Shaw). 

ND’s season is still hanging by a thread.  Whether it unravels or gets sewn back into the fabric of the playoffs will be determined next Sunday with a big four game series against the 4^th place Smoking Loons just before the trading deadline.

Draft Day April 2.

It looked like a good start as CN scored 5 in the first to tire Tyson Ross with Arrieta was on the mound.  But Ross settled down and silenced the CN  bats and Arrieta gave up a ballpark homer to Vogt, followed by 2 walks in the 7^th to become tired himself.  The cowardly CN manager pulled him, and next thing you know it is 5-5.  Bryce Harper answered in the top of the 8^th with a leadoff homerun (Rizzo missing a ballpark homer), but Vogt answered for ND with another ballpark homer to tie it.  Next thing you know, we are in extra innings and Rizzo makes up for his earlier missed bp homer with a 10^th inning double scoring Donaldson and CN holds on with Capps getting as save.

Random chit chat:  CN claimed to have been fairly healthy with only 4 or 5 injuries in the first half and Arnie confidentally states “I have had a lot of injuries, so hopefully all done for the most part….”

Game 2:  CN goes up 7-1 after 6 and looks to 'Cruz' to the end but then two things happened – Nelson Cruz was injured for the rest of the series and Vogt hit another ballpark homer and ND plated 3 in the 9^th to fall short 7-4.

Game 3 had  Vogt hitting two more homers (ballpark and non ballpark, numbers 4 and 5 of the series) but that was all the scoring for ND as CN took game 3 8-2 (all on 2 run homers – Sano, Harper, Sano and Forsythe).

Game 4 was the last chance for ND to pull out a game but CN once again jumped out to a big lead - 4-0 in the first on 3 homers.  The head hunting CN hurlers then took out Goldschmidt (injured for 2 games) and Travis Shaw (out for 6 games) to attempt to stop any chance of a comeback.  ND still managed to pull close as they scratched out a unearned run and 2 solo shots in different innings to get the game to 4-3 after 5 with CN starter Liriano leaving the game.  Alex Gordon hit a home run to give CN a 5-3 lead, but that was immediately answered by an Ortiz ballpark homer in the bottom of the 6^th.  Both sides bullpens bore down and the score remained 5-4 for a CN sweep.

Draft Day, Sunday April 2

Eric reiterated his hatred of playing on the computer.  Again, don't want to put words in his mouth, but the gist of it is that it doesn't feel like real Strat-O-Matic.  I dunno.  Looking back, I feel there were plenty of Strat-O-like quirks (e.g. 2 Catcher X's in the same inning, with one scoring a run...runner pegged out on a 1-15 steal chance, runner pegged out at the plate on a 1-12 chance, errors by Gold Glove fielders etc.). 

There were no good leads in the entire series and only one stolen base.  No ballpark homers or anything even close.  No controversy, other than me playing too fast in game 3 (where I got pounded). 

Eric hit .271 (but with 0 HR) as a team for the series, with a 1.75 ERA.  Lemahieu and Bogaerts both hit over .400 and Dickerson stayed hot at .375.  Bastardo was stellar in relief, pitching 3.2 innings of shutout ball against the lefty-heavy Asshole lineup.  For Oceanus, Panik and Moustakas hit over .350 and Cervelli and Peralta combined to hit .583.  Hernandez, Keuchel and Price pitched a total of 20.1 innings allowing only 2 earned runs. 

From Eric: hatred....? perhaps jed's right. standard strat-o quirks? also right. but... i hit zero home runs. i got zero good leads, and tried for 8 or so. jed got one, and--as he said--got pegged. as i knew he would. i could almost predict the negative rolls for both teams. neither squad hit. maybe the ballpark? jed's a scary matchup for me. my guess is he'll take 3 at least next time around in his park.....

…….

Remember, at the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve, all teams receive a day off!  Happy New Year.

In the battle to finish just outside of the playoffs, Oceanus managed to win 3 of 4 primarily due to a distinct lack of good thing rolls on the part of Bay City.  Three of the games were close - two decided by a score of 2-1.  For Bay City, who hit only .194 as a team, Miguel Cabrera stood out with his .385 average.  For Oceanus, Mahtook and Beltre combined to go 6 for 9 with 3 HR an 7 RBI.  And of course, Brantley tormented his former team by hitting .400.  Here are the slightly-edited computer-generated game summaries.

Game 1

Right fielder Stephen Piscotty had 2 base hits as the Bay City Rollers bested the Oceanus Assholes 2 to 1 in Bay City. Tony Watson (1-0) came on to close the door tight in relief.  He did not allow a hit or a walk in his 1 and 1/3 innings.  The teams had been locked in a scoreless duel until the 7th inning.  Watson got relief help from Wade Davis who gained credit for his 1st save.  Dallas Keuchel (0-1) was the losing pitcher.  He allowed 5 hits and 4 walks in 7 and 2/3 innings.

Game 2

Adrian Beltre had 4 hits and 4 RBI as the Assholes evened the series against the Rollers by the score of 9 to 1. Beltre had a good day at the plate.  He banged out a single which brought home a run in the 1st inning, ripped a one-base hit in the 3rd inning, bombed a two-run dinger in the 7th inning and lined a base-hit which scored a run in the 9th inning.  Overall Oceanus out-hit Bay City 12 to 7.  David Price (1-0) allowed 1 run in 7 and 2/3 innings, and picked up the victory. Newly-arrived Cole Hamels (0-1) ended up with the loss.  He served up 3 homeruns in his 9 innings.

Game 3

Oceanus nipped Bay City team 2 to 1 in a hard fought contest. Felix Hernandez (1-0) pitched a solid game.  He went 7 innings surrendering 4 hits and 3 walks.  Hernandez struckout 9 Bay City batters.  Overall Oceanus out-hit Bay City 8 to 5.  Hernandez got help from Darren O'Day who earned his 1st save.  Zach Britton (0-1) was hit with the loss in relief.  He surrendered 1 hit and no walks in 2 innings.

Game 4

Second baseman Joe Panik homered and had 2 RBI as Oceanus prevailed in the series finale 7 to 4. Corey Kluber (1-0) was solid if not spectacular.  He went 5 innings surrendering 4 hits and no walks and served up 2 'big flies'.  Bay City was out-hit by Oceanus, 11 hits to 7.  Darren O'Day preserved the game for Kluber, recording his his 2nd save. Yovani Gallardo (0-1) was the loser.  He was knocked around by Oceanus, allowing 9 hits and 5 walks in 5 and 1/3 innings.